If Spirytus had advertising…

Spirytus neutral grain spirit is a 95% Polish / Estonian vodka beverage, it is not exactly what many people would describe as expensive to buy, it is cheap… (may as well be petrol)

Here is the advertising I imagine for such a drink…

All your family were killed in a plane crash, you are too depressed to work and now live in a hedge…

Drink Spirytus…

Your loved ones were raped by gangsters and you were punished by being locked in a high security mental ward for complaining…

Drink Spirytus…

For some reason everyone you know have committed suicide or gone to prison…

Drink Spirytus…

You were beaten, robbed and burnt alive because someone else owed someone else some money, now you can only write with half the alphabet…

Drink Spirytus…

Tried committing suicide only to survive and now you speak in the dialect of small primates and poo yourself…

Drink Spirytus…

You and all your friends were molested at school, and given bad exam results for being a naughty tale tale, now you are a prostitute who is thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of monetary units in debt (or even millions)…

Drink Spirytus…

There is no justice in the world, except on television.

But who the hell has a television…

Drink Spirytus…

You are dead? Tsk tsk tsk, no Spirytus for you…

Drink Spirytus, the best medical care that money can buy…

Now with Vitamin S…

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